The Difficulties Are Not in the Way … They Are the Way

This morning, during my quiet time, I came across a line in one of my devotionals that stopped me in my tracks:

“The difficulties in my life are not in the way of God’s plan.
They are a tool of it. They’re crafted to advance His work of grace.”

I read it once. Then again.
And instantly, I felt that tug. The one that says, this is for you.

But I also felt something else: this is for every woman I work with who’s trying to find peace and freedom in her alcohol-free life.

Because if there’s one truth that will reshape your entire sober journey, it’s this:

Your difficulties are not detours. They are directions.

God Doesn’t Waste Struggle

The sentence in that devotional reframed something big for me. Not just in my personal life, but in how I view the process of quitting drinking.

The hard moments, the slips, the cravings, the “I can’t do this” days: they’re not in the way of your progress. They are the path that builds your strength. They are God’s way (or your higher power’s way) of showing you exactly where to place your focus and energy.

Each time you stumble, it’s not a failure.
It’s a spotlight saying: Here. This is where we do the work.

That fight after a long day? That weekend you gave in? That moment you felt ashamed? Those are not proof you’re failing; they’re invitations. They’re opportunities to develop the patience, self-awareness, and resilience that freedom requires.

You cannot skip them.
You cannot avoid them.
They are how you learn what it means to live free.

The Work Isn’t Harder. It’s Just New

Here’s something that might sting a little, but it’s spoken with love:

The work of healing isn’t any harder than the work of drinking.

Drinking takes so much work:
the mental gymnastics, the regret, the hiding, the exhaustion, the shame.
We’ve just grown used to it.

When you start learning a new way - one that involves awareness, accountability, and new habits - it feels harder only because it’s unfamiliar.

But hard doesn’t mean impossible.
It means growth is happening.

Choosing not to drink isn’t about punishing yourself or proving your strength. It’s about building the character that can only be formed in the doing. Each moment of resistance, each hard night, each uncomfortable emotion: that’s where transformation is born.

What If This Is Exactly How It’s Supposed to Feel?

If you’re in a hard season, maybe the question isn’t “Why is this happening?”

Maybe it’s,

“What is this trying to teach me?”

What is God doing right here, right now?
What is my sober journey showing me right here, right now?

Because your sober journey is employing these very difficulties as tools. Tools to produce character, faith, and confidence that cannot grow any other way.

It’s not punishment. It’s preparation.
And just like a muscle, your spiritual and emotional strength are built through resistance.

You can’t develop peace without practicing it in chaos.
You can’t learn confidence without standing in discomfort.
You can’t build freedom without walking through the temptation to give it away.

The only way through is through.

Grace for the Messy Middle

When toddlers learn to walk, they fall more than they stand.
When kids learn to read, they sound out every letter before they find flow.
Why would learning to live without alcohol be any different?

You’re unlearning years, maybe even decades, of automatic responses.
You’re teaching your brain and your body that you are safe without alcohol, that you can face life fully awake.

It’s not supposed to be neat. It’s supposed to be new.
And every time you try again, you are rewiring your brain, strengthening your spirit, and moving closer to the peace you keep praying for.

So instead of asking, “Why is this still hard?” try asking,

“What is this moment showing me about what I still need to learn?”

Because when you stay curious instead of critical, everything changes.

Faith in the Process

Whatever name you give your higher power - God, Spirit, the Universe - remember this: nothing is wasted.

Even the tears, the false starts, the nights you wish you could redo… they all have purpose.
They’re shaping you into the woman you’re becoming.

And when you look back, whether that’s three months or three years from now, you’ll realize that every difficulty really was part of the plan. Each one was a tool of grace, not a barrier to it.

So this week, if you hit a hard moment, whisper this to yourself:
“This isn’t in my way. It’s teaching me the way.”

Because it is 🖤

xx -

Shannon